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Dennis Miller Quotes

«Now, I don't want to get off on a rant here, but guilt is simply God's way of letting you know that you're having too good a time.»
Author: Dennis Miller (Actor, Comedian) | Keywords: get off, rant, ranting
«What is guilt? Guilt is the pledge drive constantly hammering in our heads that keeps us from fully enjoying the show. Guilt is the reason they put the articles in Playboy.»
«Washington, DC is to lying what Wisconsin is to cheese.»
Author: Dennis Miller (Actor, Comedian) | About: Cities | Keywords: cheese, Washington, Wisconsin
«It's ironic that in our culture everyone's biggest complaint is about not having enough time; yet nothing terrifies us more than the thought of eternity.»
«I lapsed into rude.»
«You've got bad eating habits if you use a grocery cart in 7-Eleven okay?»
«If Clinton had only attacked terrorism as much as he attacks George Bush we wouldn't be in this problem.»
«There's no doubt about it, show business lures the people who didn't get enough love, attention, or approval early in life and have grown up to become bottomless, gaping vessels of terrifying, abject need. Please laugh.»
«One man's Voltaire is another man's Screech.»
«The White House looked into a plan that would allow illegal immigrants to stay in the United States. The plan called for a million Mexicans to marry a million of our ugliest citizens.»

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