A satire written about family reunions.

There were very few things that brought whole families together. The only real occasions were weddings and funerals. Then, some brillian mind, unsatisfied with this arrangement, invented the family reunion. The family reunion brings your entire family together for no reason. At family reunions, you will reminisce, you will laugh, you will cry, you will discover your family tree has more branches than you ever thought possible while Grandpa fishes his dentures out of the …

…Family reunions are a trial especially for those trapped in the generation gap. You're eighteen and the closest relatives to your age are twelve and thirty. It would be rude to read a book. In short, family reunions are a pointless hassle to which there is absolutely no point. Telephones can provide the same amount of communication required, plus the benefit of hanging up. There is no travelling involved, or obligations to feed other people.